Part of learning how to gain confidence is an ability to maintain a positive attitude about yourself and your life. A key aspect to being positive is maintaining a sense of hope.I look at hope as simply a belief that there is something good to look forward to in your future. This may relate to many different things, including family, friends, life experiences, holidays and career success.But the problem is too many people look at hope as something that comes and goes, that they have no control over. They think that their hopefulness is simply a reflection of their external situation. If things are going to get better in their lives, they feel hopeful. If things are going poorly, they feel hopeless.
Imagine you are at a public gathering and you have really low self confidence at that point in time. You come home and you feel really bad because you thought you where judged by other people. Your best friend James, thought the same thing when he came home. Judith thought exactly the same thing. The point is, people care more about themselves than they care about you. So inevitably don't care what other people think of you. You are not put on this planet to please all. It's OK to fail, it's OK to be different, it's OK to do what you feel is right for you!
Secondly, our hope stems from the things we focus on. We can actively develop hope long before anything good or bad happens to us in a particular area of our life. Yes, that's right, we can develop hope. How?We develop hope by focussing on things that give us hope. By shifting our focus to the positives, we automatically create feelings of hope. For instance, if you continually think about your successes in life, you will be more inclined to feel strong and good about yourself. If you focus on what is working at the moment (rather than what is wrong) you will feel better.
At the end of the day, you've interacted with others and will notice that you feel much lighter.Learning to become more relaxed is a great life enhancer. People who are more relaxed have fewer problems with their memories and are more likely to take the bumps in the road of life in stride.
The practice of meditation has gained popularity for this reason. You might want to look into Tai Chi, which involves physical relaxation techniques.Whatever method you decide on, take relaxation seriously. The benefits are just too great to ignore. If you've never considered relaxation important, think of it this way: if you can attend to something that results in feeling good, how can you not gain confidence in your personal abilities?
People who are close to you have more impact on you than you think. Sometimes if you want to change you have to change your surroundings and it should start with your friends.If some of your friends are negative, pessimistic people, they make you a negative and pessimistic person too. And that makes it very hard to improve your confidence. Stop meeting with people who make you feel bad and start meeting with people who make you feel good (preferably with highly confident people).
Confident people automatically "take the bull by the horns", without even thinking about it. When confident people don't like something, they change it.On the other hand, people who are not confident tend to struggle with making changes, but if they wish to lead an enjoyable and comfortable life, then they will need to learn how to gain confidence to make the required changes.
Make a list on a piece of card of all of your positive attributes and all of your strengths. Put this somewhere where you will see it everyday - stick it on your fridge or on your computer monitor. Alternatively, carry this in your purse or wallet. Read your list out loud everyday. Over time this becomes absorbed into your subconscious mind and you automatically start to feel more confident.
You don't need to start with speaking with native speakers. You can start with some easy things such as writing a few words on YouTube (comment videos), participating in online communities (for example message boards) or chatting online (you can use Sharedtalk to speak with other learners and native speakers).Easier said than done, but this is the whole "secret" - if you want to gain confidence to speak a foreign language, you need to speak a lot. It will probably be stressful at the beginning, but that's how you expand your comfort zone - by stepping outside of it. Sometimes it's better to just go for it.
Try to learn something new everyday to broaden your mind. There's nothing better than knowledge to make you feel more confident about yourself. The great Anthony Robbins said, "Once you stop growing, you die." Sound advice.By learning how to gain confidence, over the course of time you will find that it becomes much easier for you to make any necessary changes to your life. This in turn gives you even more confidence. And the cycle repeats.
Imagine you are at a public gathering and you have really low self confidence at that point in time. You come home and you feel really bad because you thought you where judged by other people. Your best friend James, thought the same thing when he came home. Judith thought exactly the same thing. The point is, people care more about themselves than they care about you. So inevitably don't care what other people think of you. You are not put on this planet to please all. It's OK to fail, it's OK to be different, it's OK to do what you feel is right for you!
Secondly, our hope stems from the things we focus on. We can actively develop hope long before anything good or bad happens to us in a particular area of our life. Yes, that's right, we can develop hope. How?We develop hope by focussing on things that give us hope. By shifting our focus to the positives, we automatically create feelings of hope. For instance, if you continually think about your successes in life, you will be more inclined to feel strong and good about yourself. If you focus on what is working at the moment (rather than what is wrong) you will feel better.
At the end of the day, you've interacted with others and will notice that you feel much lighter.Learning to become more relaxed is a great life enhancer. People who are more relaxed have fewer problems with their memories and are more likely to take the bumps in the road of life in stride.
The practice of meditation has gained popularity for this reason. You might want to look into Tai Chi, which involves physical relaxation techniques.Whatever method you decide on, take relaxation seriously. The benefits are just too great to ignore. If you've never considered relaxation important, think of it this way: if you can attend to something that results in feeling good, how can you not gain confidence in your personal abilities?
People who are close to you have more impact on you than you think. Sometimes if you want to change you have to change your surroundings and it should start with your friends.If some of your friends are negative, pessimistic people, they make you a negative and pessimistic person too. And that makes it very hard to improve your confidence. Stop meeting with people who make you feel bad and start meeting with people who make you feel good (preferably with highly confident people).
Confident people automatically "take the bull by the horns", without even thinking about it. When confident people don't like something, they change it.On the other hand, people who are not confident tend to struggle with making changes, but if they wish to lead an enjoyable and comfortable life, then they will need to learn how to gain confidence to make the required changes.
Make a list on a piece of card of all of your positive attributes and all of your strengths. Put this somewhere where you will see it everyday - stick it on your fridge or on your computer monitor. Alternatively, carry this in your purse or wallet. Read your list out loud everyday. Over time this becomes absorbed into your subconscious mind and you automatically start to feel more confident.
You don't need to start with speaking with native speakers. You can start with some easy things such as writing a few words on YouTube (comment videos), participating in online communities (for example message boards) or chatting online (you can use Sharedtalk to speak with other learners and native speakers).Easier said than done, but this is the whole "secret" - if you want to gain confidence to speak a foreign language, you need to speak a lot. It will probably be stressful at the beginning, but that's how you expand your comfort zone - by stepping outside of it. Sometimes it's better to just go for it.
Try to learn something new everyday to broaden your mind. There's nothing better than knowledge to make you feel more confident about yourself. The great Anthony Robbins said, "Once you stop growing, you die." Sound advice.By learning how to gain confidence, over the course of time you will find that it becomes much easier for you to make any necessary changes to your life. This in turn gives you even more confidence. And the cycle repeats.
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